Doki Doki Morty Club
by HookahSocialism
Summary: https:/api.soundcloud.com/tracks/334506670/download?clientidcUa40O3Jg3Emvp6Tv4U6ymYYO50NUGpJ Rather than a teaser, the entire point of this one is to motivate you to find your own club. Be it of music, art, literature...find what it means to be human and dont let mods pin you into a corner of bans and just desiring emptily.


Beth and Jerry, talking it over decide maybe its best Morty go to a private school.

"Do we really want Morty to grow up in a sterile environment and a Bible thrown at his head Beth?"

"Well whats our altetnative Jerry? We let him continue down this road turning into a school shooter or worse...my father?"

Morty goes to this new private school and looks around. Its a lot smaller and a lot more quiet. Which sounds great but all the students just kinda stare at him. Not in judgement but almost like he's an alien or something. All of a sudden he bumps into this tall girl and she drops her books.

"Geez my bad I..."

He looks and its a long brown haired girl who looks like something right out of anime.

"You must be the new student. I can tell you're not from around here."

"No I"

"Well we wouldnt want you to feel like an outcast on your first day. And here you can keep your grades up by just participating in club activities. As president of the literature club Imma help you fit right into this school and you"ll have lots of fun i guarantee it."

"Wow gee thats nice of you um"

"Monkia"

"Monkia but like...I dont read that much. Unless you count manga. It aint the sortof manga you can bring to school if you catch my drift." Monkia giggles.

"Thats funny...you're funny. So Ill see you after class is over right?"

"Sure I guess?"

"Perfect."

In class he notices some other hot anime looking girls too. As he sits down the one behind him is this tiny little pink haired doll examining him.

"So you're the new kid? Jesus they"ll just let anyone into this school to make money."

"Wow thats...kinda mean."

A tall purple haired one next to her scolds.

"Dont scare the new kid Natsuki! I bet he's very nice. Im Yuri. Have you considered joining the literature club or have the teachers forgotten to even bring up the value of joining a club in the school's corriculem again?"

Morty begins to sweat and look around thinking

"Geez this book club is full of cute anime girls and im invited! Am I in a simulation or something? This better not be a Rick prank or imma kick him right in the balls."

After class he talks with them all and they explain more about the intent of the literature club and what they do to prove their legitimacy to the school corriculum. As they begin to devise a plan of what book to read and subject matters to focus on from said book a girl he hasnt met yet prior raises her hand.

"Lets read Screwtape Letters! This IS a private school... So an extreme Catholic who wrote about demons not being so much evil as unable to comprehend good concepts like love and loyalty, falling into bureacratic madness might make good social commentary on the state of a liberal America!"

"Thats excellent thinking Sayori..."

Morty chimes in.

"Yah I heard Rick mention that book before. Thought it was weird he'd read something like that. Wasnt he also the guy who wrote Narnia?"

Sayori pokes his nose.

"You got it kiddo!"

Monkia gives a death glare to Sayori but snaps out of it.

"I love the fact our newest member is eager to learn and delve into philosophical implications! Maybe you know, IIII as the president...should be his study partner. I am curious and wanna see how..."

Yuri intterupts

"Hey thats not fair! I always get stuck with Natsuki and shes always so pushy!"

"Im only pushy because YOU dont pay attention and it makes us look bad! The only reason you get better grades than me is all the male teachers are pigs and love your big teenage boobies!"

"Oh geez"

Sayori says

"Comeon guys. We should let Morty pick who he wants to be his study partner!" Monika crosses her arms.

"I suppose..."

Morty waves his hands.

"Oh wow no. Thats ALOT of pressure and Im not here to pick favorites I I...just wanna get decent grades so I dont get stuck working at Gamestop or something." Monkia assures him

"Its fine Morty... we're all mature and stable women here."

Natsuko snorts a bit when Monkia says that and tries to make it out like she was just coughing.

"Ok uh...I guess Sayori? It was her idea, and im guessing she knows more about CS Lewis and the book so..."

"Yay!"

As she jumps up Morty caught a glimpse of her underwear and looks away. Monkia seems unphased and just says "Okey doki doki! Well for the next week I expect all of you to put in your best effort!" as in her mind DELETE THIS memes float around.

Morty and Sayuro walk home and as Morty opens the door he sees Summer on the couch all sprawled out scratching herself.

"Wow, Morty gonna get laid on the first day of school? Wish I went to a private school."

Sayuro whispers to Morty

"Your sister is very vulgar, is she the lesbian?"

"What? Haha no! No...aww geez. You private schoolers are just really sheltered I guess. Its probably best we go straight to my room and avoid Rick."

As they do Rick is in there looking for something.

"Morty did you touch my...JESUS CHRIST MORTY WHAT IS THAT THING?!"

Sayuro points at herself confused and Rick pulls out something that looks like Egons ghost detector from Ghostbusters examining her.

"Oh boy this is bad...You... outta this house right now. Me and Morty need to have a little talk."

"I promise sir I had no ill intent with Morty. You can leave the door wide open if you want..."

"That wholesome meme shit wont work on me. Out out OUT!"

As she turns around he kicks her butt from behind.

"Geez Rick that is way out of line! Sayori seems like a really nice girl and..."

"Morty how fucking stupid can you possibly be?! You know how much twisted shit we deal with? Do you (belch uhhh) know who I am?! If i tell you to stay away from something theres a reason... Im gonna have to tell your parents to get you out of that school now. Thats like...a whole day of brain control technology I dont wanna do! Christ!"

"Well...can you at least tell me why?"

Rick groans and pulls his hair.

"You didnt get spotted by the hivemind did you?"

"The what?"

"The motherboard AI (burp)... That stupid little bitch is the emotional filtering. You didnt come across someone who made it apparent they run the show did you?"

"You mean Monkia?"

Rick raises his eyebrow

"Monkia WHO?"

"I...Just Monkia"

"Uhoh"

"Rick?"

"Uhoh" Rick runs out to the garage and Morty hears drilling and sees lights glowing and says to himself

"I should just probably go look on for shitty jobs right now..."

The next day Morty goes back to school and whispers to Natsuki and Yuri "Sorry about my grandpa... I hope Sayuko doesnt think Im like that. Rick is a very hateful person but is like...super smart so there must be some reason he..."

Natsuki just looks confused.

"Whose Sayuko?"

Yuri whispers to Morty too

"Yeah theres never even been a student registered under that name at this school. Let alone joined the literature club. You must be confused."

"Uhoh"

Morty is way too nervous to encounter Monkia again now and tries to sneak out avoiding the literature club but shes standing right there.

"MORTY...we still dont have a plan for our corriculum activities...maybe I should be the one to come home and study with you."

"I uhhh...Grandpa Rick is very conservative and umm...doesnt want me bringing girls home?"

Monkias eyes bleed

"It wasnt a suggestion..."

"Oh geez..."

Morty comes home with his head down and when he opens the door Summer is sprawled out yet again scratching herself.

"ANOTHER girl? Wew lad...Morty is just a little player with all these Christian sluts aint he?"

"Its not like that Summer..."

"I see...it was wrong of me to take my anger out on Sayuro. Its clear the real blame here likes in your unwholesome godless family."

Morty sighs and says with no willpower left

"Oh geez..."

Rick suddenly comes into the room too with a Ghostbusters proton pack on and freaksout

"Shit Morty! Youl coulda at least texted me first!"

Monkias eyes grow into two black voids as she looks Ricks way

"YOU..."

"Yeah me cunt..."

Rick turns on the proton pack and blasts Monkia with it to the ghostbusters theme. She begins to glitchout looking like missing number from Pokemon but recomposes herself

"NO! I will not have my files corrupted by some heathen homosexual!"

"Morty (belch!) you you...gotta be the one to say it! Tell her shes a crazy bitch and you want nothing to do with her!"

"Geez Rick I..."

"Its now or never Morty! This proton beam shell eventually learn how to just ignore completely...you need to be the one to consent too NOT taking part in this horror dating sim shit."

"I... Monkia I..."

"Dont listen to some decrepit oldman whose lost faith in everything Morty! I can be whatever you want me to be! You want a sexy girl who puts out everyday? A loving housewife who cooks you dinner? I can shape my world...your world...OUR WORLD to ve anything your heart desires! Just let me into your life Morty! I dont wanna be the wish fulfillment of some fat anime nerd with even less personality than fucking Natsuki!"

At home studying Natsuki's nose starts bleeding as she is doing homework.

"Monkia I... I can see as some sort of weird Lovecraftian AI thing you just dont comprehend what it means to be human. I think you probably do get what it means to want to be loved...but your programming only takes you so far as to fulfill some sociopathic end result to be desired. Not motivated or improved upon. Thr truth is Monkia I think Sayuro choosing screwtape letters was a cry for help. That the human experience isnt one of sexuality or even romance...thats just traps we fall into it."

"I can be a trap!" a giant bulge purks against her skirt and Morty cringes

"Oh geez NO! No Monkia you dont get it! Love isnt supposed to be escapism! I could do drugs for that. Play video games or read stories for that! Love is supposed to motivate us to try and be better people for those we care about!"

"Do you care about me Morty?"

"I do...but do you care about me?"

"I, hmm"

Suddenly Monkia closes her eyes and turns into a body of binary 1s and 0s and begins to dissintegrate. As she does Morty puts his hand on her.

"You were programmed to want to BE loved, not know what love is. Too many people allow their files to get corrupted the same way."

When she dissapears completely Rick lets out a sigh of relief.

"That (burp) was a close one...she could have done some real reality altering damage Morty...WELP NOW THAT IS TAKEN CARE OF...Im gonna go find hentai pictures of her. Heheh WUBBA LUBBA DUBDUB! Morty shakes his head. The next day back at public school in class. Morty swears he can hear a piano version of Linkin Park's numb. "I'll be better next game, I promise."


End file.
